Hisshou Dungeon Unei Houhou

Side : Steve

Specie : Goblin army leader

Its bad. Real Bad.

I really wont survive getting involved with the Generals wives.

No, well thats not really fair. Realistically its just one.

His other wives are harmless, Delille is well just a little, you know, but on the inside shes surprisingly normal.

However, Miss Seraria is a big no-no.

Why? Because she refuses to obey the General. Thats a big no-no!!

(Aslin)Steve, you cant get injured!!

At the feet of the General was our little o-hime-sama1), she was giving me her support, like a cute cheerleader.

Ohh!! I can feel motivation rising!!

(Seraria)Steve, you dont have to go easy on him.

Wait a minute. Whats motivation again?

With perfect timing, Seraria nee-chan interjected.

(Seraria)Steve, Vilia and Hiro came today Aslin in the lead. You cant show them anything strange alright?

Oni2)huh!!

The General also had to fight with such a feeling a while ago!!

Of all things, to use children!3)

Hey, General!!

I sent a meaningful glance to the General, asking him to put his wife in order.

He raised his hands and glanced away, my plea was rejected

Hurgh, I have no allies here!!

Uh, how did it come to this..

I started reminiscing as I looked at my reflection in my practice longsword.

==== Jump in time to the past ====

Right after the General won against the adventurer.

At that time, Squad A was stationed at the entrance to the Adventurer Guild, while I was inside checking the current situation with the Guild.

(Adventurer)Uh?Why is there a Goblin here?

So, I was noticed by an adventurer.

(Adventurer)A monster Why is it not attacking us?

(Adventurer)Hey now, earlier today, there was an explanation that the monsters outside of the Dungeon District are under control.

(Adventurer)Oh, that reminds me, hes wearing the security armband.

Thats right, so please leave me be.

Then Ill be able to leisurely enjoy my grape juice.

Ah, by the way, we monsters who are defending the city are receiving a tentative salary for the time being.

The people of the city were told, that we arent dangerous.

Thanks to that, weve been sincerely guarding the city, schools, shops, and training centers; getting along well with the inhabitants.

Well that said, today is my holiday.

Because of their arrival my break was ruined!!

Even when I thought I would be able to play cards after a long time

Thanks to the General, our head is pretty good, he made us capable of remembering things and we had a fun time learning a lot to the point where we could read, write and do calculations.

Also we got to play games.

As for the wives, we could receive their requests, because we felt that they could be trusted.

Thats how I was thinking, until the recent duel with the general.

(Adventurer)Hey, is this Goblin part of the security that is said to be really strong?

(Adventurer)Dont be stupid. A goblin?What rank is it regarding Guilds subjugation?

(Adventurer)True, its a mere rank 2 for beginners and yet the defense is entrusted to that? Are those guys employed by Seraria-samas husband?

(Adventurer)Now that you mention it, that really could be the case, that crazy guy

Dont stare so much!!

Im not interested in a man!!

(Adventurer)Some of the Lord or Knight Goblins are ranked 3 or 4 arent they?

(Adventurer)Ah, if youre around rank 4, you cant possibly serve as a security guard right?

(Adventurer)That might be the case, but either way, I havent seen him wearing anthing like that?He is also too small to be a Knight or a Lord.

(Adventurer)True, he is just a Goblin equipped with fancy clothes. Wild ones have straw pants and a crude weapon.

Hey, dont compare me with the wild exhibitionist bunch outside!!

When we had the spare time, I went outside of the Dungeon and witnessed the sad madness of my fellow kin outside!!

Whats more they dont even bath, I dont want to be seen in the same light as those perverts!!

Those exhibitionists I just mentioned were exterminated by our unit.

People who have a hard time imagining it, can imagine the following.

Imagine you and your acquaintance are suddenly dumped into the Victorian era where the streets stink and are full of excrement. Then some random stranger runs up to you for a hug, to top it all off he/she/it doesnt even bathe or shower!!

(Seraria)Is something wrong I wonder?

(Adventurer)Seraria-sama!?

(Adventurer)No, but that monster, the Goblin, he walked inside the Guild earlier. Is the monster part of the security?

(Seraria)Huh?All guards in the security wear this armband. Didnt you hear the explanation?

(Adventurer)No, I was listening, but Im surprised to see a Goblin being part of the security.

(Seraria)Oh right, but he is.

(Adventurer)Umm well though I am being impolite, but are you sure that it is suitable for security

(Seraria)I understand ne

Ah, I had a bad feeling.

Seraria nee-sans eyes squinted and there was a smell of danger in the air!!

When you first see her, you would think she is just hot-blooded.

I dont want to be a part of this.

I think Ill just slip away silen-

Gashi

Grabbed by the nape of my neck, I was pulled to Seraria nee-san.

(Seraria)Where are you trying to go Steve?

(Steve)Go, Gobu N-no, Im part of the security, its time that I go on a patrol so

(Seraria)Ara, how diligent. Your raising your voice because youre worried about the security? But dont we have an incident right here? We should take care of this lacking image they have of you first and foremost.

Wearing a beaming smile, Seraria nee-san abducted me.

==== Jump in time into the present ====

This was the result.

(Seraria)Well, now we have a representative guard of our city. Steve, a monster Goblin. Earlier some adventurers came talking to me about the Goblins asking if it was okay for them to be part of the security force. Thats a bad image. Because of that, I want the adventurers to feel their skills by fighting with the Goblin Steve. Of course you can try to kill, you can kill him without worries.

Wow!!

(Seraria)Well, because you all dont have any motivation, lets make it 1 gold coin if you can defeat Steve.

(Adventurers)Ooooo!

Ugiyaaaaaaaaaaa, totally outrageous damn what she said !

At least for the General there was no killing!!

Human rights No, I really wanted to cry out loudly about living beings rights!!

Im alive after all!!

(Philia)Steve, do your best like nii-sama!!

(Vilia)Work hard like onii-sama, Steve. I think you can, but

(Hiro)Onee, thats not something you should be saying.

Kuu, the General has preferential treatment.

(Seraria)Now, are you ready to fight?

Seraria nee-san called out towards the area where we were about to fight.

(Steve)Gobu.. ?What about them, can I kill them?

(Seraria)Nope. No good.

(Steve)Gobu!?So Cruel!?

While I was asking that, an adventurer from earlier came forward.

(Adventurer)One gold coin. Well, I want to say that I am not attracted by it, but know that I am also interested in the competence of that Goblin. Let me be your opponent.

Well, mou, can I run away already?

(GrandMaster)Ho ho ho. This looks interesting. Seraria-sama, can I watch this?

(Seraria)Yes, please do so.

My way out!?

If I ran away now, they would reduce my salary!?

Oni4)!! Akuma5)l!! With those Half finished breast of yours!! It should be either big for hope or flat for justice!!

(Seraria) Salary reduction

(Steve)Gobiyu?GObuuuuuu! You can read minds!?Thats tyrannical discrimination!

(Seraria)Not if you win. Easy right?

Mou, I wont be able to leave for a while!!

Lets knock him into the ground quickly!!

Which reminds me, this guy is heavily involved with the cause of all this!!

(Seraria)Well then You two. Hajime!6)!

Seraria-sama gave the signal.

(Steve)Gobuuuu! Rest in piecesss

(Adventurer)Uwa7)?

As for the result, because I have overdone it, the treatment fees would be deducted from my salary.

Thats too much.

==========

Afterword of the author

Yes, it was a story from Steve.

In the meantime, it also served for Serarias purpose of showing to the adventurers that they cant mess with the security.

Half of it was for her own amusement though

I will give a silent prayer for Steves wallet.

References