Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 617 – Sending Off

“So, um, are you… okay?”

“Hm? More than okay, it’s delicious!”

“Indeed, as expected.”

Jorgen and Adela were taking large bites out of their hearty Grilled Meat Sandwiches, looking unfairly fine despite being almost flat on their faces yesterday.

For some reason, they came by this morning to say sorry for what happened yesterday. This was a little unusual because the High Elves would normally go and buy their breakfast before setting out to work. They took the trouble to come by just to apologise, so I ended up having them stay for breakfast.

Speaking of which, Elrand-san was still stuck at the house. Or rather, he was still stuck under the barrier where they had put him inside their homes. These two High Elves were on their way out to buy breakfast and probably some rations before collecting him and meeting with the others at the gate.

[1] “I’m so ashamed about what happened yesterday,” said Jorgen.

[1] “Yes, please accept our apologies…” said Adela.

[1] “No, no,” I insisted for the umpteenth time. “It happens.” I can’t tell them that I had enjoyed seeing them in their miserable state…

[1] “As a gesture of our apology, please accept this [2] Ground Mushroom from us,” Jorgen said as he handed me a box.

[2] “A Ground Mushroom?” I said interestedly. The most famous ground mushroom I know is the so-called ‘truffle’, very expensive and difficult to obtain. Not only were they impossible to cultivate, they were also difficult to find in the wild.

[2] “This Ground Mushroom is very valuable, especially among High Elves. As you know, it is difficult for our kind to conceive. Tea made with this Ground Mushroom greatly increases the chances of High Elves to conceive,” said Adela happily.

“… I see…”

“I believe that humans regard this Ground Mushroom as a valuable aphrodisiac as well. Therefore, it should fetch quite a considerable price in the market. Naturally, you are also welcome to use it for yourself.” Jorgen said with a smirk.

“Ah hah…” Is this High Elf making fun of me? He’s making fun of me, isn’t he? Just look at that obnoxious smirk on his face. After thanking him, I abruptly tossed the box into my [Item Box]. The treasured Ground Mushroom could stay there forever!!

[2] “Then, we won’t take up any more of your time,” said Jorgen.

[2] “We’ll head out once we had our breakfast~”

[2] “Wait,” I said. “Why don’t you have breakfast with us instead?”

[2] Do you think I was being kind by asking them to breakfast? Oh no. I want to feed them good things. Lots and lots of good things and remind them that without me around, they will no longer be able to eat any of these incredibly delicious things.

“Today we are having Grilled Meat Sandwiches.”

“G-grilled meat?” Jorgen’s mouth began to water.

“I-in special bread?” Adela swallowed.

“Indeed,” I said generously. “It’s made with thinly sliced Dungeon Beef cooked in special sauce from my home town. The bread is Teresa’s rustic bread, thickly sliced and lightly toasted, stuffed with plenty of lettuce, locally grown by our Alban and piled high with the grilled Dungeon Beef with an extra dollop of mayonnaise as a finishing touch.”

Oh my, the two of them were actually drooling now.

“W-well, we could stay for breakfast.”

“Y-yeah…”

That was how the two High Elves ended up having breakfast with us.

By the way, I should say that since the sandwiches were meant for my familiars, they were all extra hearty, extra large, extra meaty with all the extra trimmings.

“No leaf!”

And extra lettuce leaves especially for Fer.

Since everyone else was having sandwiches for breakfast, I decided to have some too. However, mine was an open-face sandwich piled high with lettuce, shredded carrots, mayo, and a perfectly cooked fried egg dusted with a touch of salt and freshly cracked black pepper. Personally, I think my sandwich was artistically more pleasing to the eye, but when I asked whether Jorgen or Adela would like some, they ended up choosing the meat-heavy Grilled Meat Sandwich.

Tch.

No accounting for taste.

In fact, it was like I had two more familiars chomping away at my food…

Whatever, it’s not like I will see them any time soon anyway, so let them eat as much as they like.

There were several ‘seconds’, as usual. Even though I had seen it before, it was still a shock to the system to see such slender-looking humanoids stuffing their faces with such high-calorie food…

After a while, I got tired of looking at them eating and opted to settle down with a bit of tea. Once everyone had eaten and rested a little, I took out the Dragon Roast and set it on the table.

“Th-this smell!”

“I-is it-!!?”

“This is a Green Dragon Roast. Please slice it thinly and eat it with this sauce. You can also eat it with bread, like the sandwich we had earlier.”

“W-woah~ thank you, thank you!! I was just thinking what a pity that we won’t be able to eat Mukouda’s cooking any more.”

“That’s right, this is such a wonderful farewell gift. You have my absolute gratitude~”

Jorgen and Adela both looked very moved.

[3] Humph, now this is how you give gifts. Your gift-giving etiquette is too inferior. Observe my finishing move.

“Ahem, please take this as well. It’s a little dessert I made,” I said as I set down three baskets containing the three pound cake sets.

“Dessert!” Adela squealed.

“This basket is for you two. The other two are for Moira-sama and Ugor-san. I would appreciate it if you could keep these in your [Item Box] until you have all reached Doran.”

After all, it would not do for the pound cakes to spoil. Since they had to go to the Royal Capital first, and since it takes days to get anywhere without GG Airways, it’s best to have Adela keep the cakes for Moira-sama and Ugor-san.

“Speaking of which, this cake contains alcohol, so please enjoy it,” I said generously.

After the two High Elves cheered over the cakes, it was time to bring the prisoner, I mean, Elland-san to the gates.

“I’ll meet you there,” I said. Since I don’t want to walk with Elland-san all the way from my house to Carelina’s gates.

“Oi, you sure he’s leaving today?” said Fer. Even he was tired of having Elland-san around.

“He had better,” Grandpa Gon muttered.

“”I want to see him leave with my own eyes!”” Dora-chan exclaimed.

“”Uncle Elf~? Goodbye~?””

“Ah, yes, we’re saying goodbye to Uncle Elf,” I said. Well, that’s as good an explanation as any…

“H-hey, Uncle Jorgen, could you at least untie me? Wait, this isn’t the way to the Guild, where are we going?!”

“Just shut your trap and come with me.”

“S-stop pulling! Ugh, I can walk without you jerking me around!”

“I’ll stop pulling if you start moving.”

“How can I move if I don’t even know where I’m going?!”

“This is going nowhere, Jorgen. Just tell him,” came Adela’s voice.

“Fine, we’re going to the Royal Capital.”

“Hah?! But why?! I was just there! I haven’t even met with Grandpa Gon or Dora-chan yet! That’s the reason why I’m here! I can’t just leave like this!! Grandpa Gon!! Dora-chan!!”

“Oi, quit it. You’re attracting attention.”

“Grandpa Gon! Dora-chan! Your friend is being dragged away!!!”

“… …” I looked at Grandpa Gon and Dora-chan. If either of them had fur, it would probably be bristling…

“Master, I think I had better-”

“Grandpa Gon!! Dora-cha–ackk!!”

“Too late, I think he saw you two,” I said cheerfully.

Even though they did not have any fur, the dragons looked like goosebumps had formed on their scales.

“My friends!! Help me!!!” Elland-san wailed.

To be honest, I do feel a bit bad for him, but not enough to come near him. Jorgen, however, had no mercy at all. He said, “These dragons do not think of you as a friend. In fact, they think you’re a terrible nuisance.”

“Lies!!” Elland-san shrieked.

“Uh…” I began but was interrupted by Grandpa Gon who bravely stepped forward to say, “No, we are not friends. You are a nuisance. A jabbering, chattering annoyance who is always bugging me for blood, saliva and scales. Kuuhh, the sight of you disgust me so much that I wish to cleanse the area with Dragon Breath.”

Woah, that was… kind of overboard?

“”Yeah! Yeah! You tell him!!””

Dora-chan was yelling through telepathy, but even an idiot could understand the angry face and shaking fist.

“Boy, just be glad you did not die,” Jorgen said as he patted Elland-san’s shoulder.

“If it was up to the dragon, you would have been incinerated to dust,” said Adela as she patted him on the other shoulder.

“H-how!!!!!” Elland-san collapsed to the ground, the very picture of a defeated man.

“How noisy. Cast the barrier, Adela,” said Jorgen.

“Sure.”

A barrier formed around Elland-san, and… his wailing could no longer be heard.

Even so, seeing him being dragged away by the back of his collar and his mouth opening and shutting like that was… really awkward.

The rest of my familiars were also not looking at Elland-san as he was being dragged away. Were they feeling awkward too?

“”Aruji~ Uncle Elf is crying~ Uncle Elf sad~~?””

“Ah, well… looks like it, haha…”

What else could I say?

[4] At the gate, Moira-sama was waiting with Ugor-san, along with two carriages and a group of very professional-looking Adventurers.

Jorgen approached with Adela and Elland-san in tow.

“Sorry about yesterday. I’ve delayed our travels.”

“No, no,” said Moira-sama. “We are the ones acting in haste. The fault is on our side.”

“That’s alright,” said Ugor-san. “I was in a hurry mostly out of habit.”

“No, no, if it is anyone’s fault. It is my nephew…”

“Ahem, speaking of which, I feel we should apologise to Mukouda-san for not keeping a better eye on our charge,” said Moira-sama regretfully.

“Ah?” I waved my hand awkwardly at them. “No, no, as you say, if it is anyone’s fault, it’s really… well, let’s not talk about it any more. Since you’re here, I have prepared some gifts for you. It is with Adela. Ugor-san should know it. It’s the dessert from before.”

“Oho, if that’s the case, please allow me to thank you on behalf of my wife and children…”

“Oh? Dessert, you say?” said Moira-sama.

While we were making small talk, Elland-san had silently stretched out his arms towards my dragons. Tears were falling from his eyes like a pair of waterfall. It was kind of scary looking actually.

“… right, I think we should leave as soon as possible,” said Jorgen.

“Indeed…”

The mute and crying Elland-san was soon bundled into one of the carriages. Jorgen and Adela went in behind him. I guess they will be guarding him day and night?

Meanwhile, Moira-sama and Ugor-san got onto the carriage in front.

“Let us meet again under better circumstances,” said Ugor-san.

“Yes,” I said fervently. “Let’s.” [5]

I stood in place until both carriages disappeared into the horizon.

“Now that that troublemaker is gone, let’s go hunting!!”

“Ou!!”

“”Yeah!!””

“”Hunting~! Hunting~!””

“What are you guys talking about? We still have that drinking party Grandpa Gon promised Bruno-san,” I said, taking great pleasure in seeing Fer deflated even as Grandpa Gon cheered. Heh, divide and conquer!

“Not to mention, I still have to make time for the offerings.”

“Offerings? You should have said so earlier! Ninril-sama’s offerings must not be delayed!”

As for the final strike…

“Actually, there’s a place I would like to go.”

“Hm?”

“Master?”

“”Oh?””

“”Aruji wants to go hunting~””

“Well, I need to replenish a lot of our beef and pork. So it’s time for another excursion to that place.”

“That place… Nu, the meat dungeon!!”

“”Ou! Let’s go!!””

“”Meaty~! Meaty~!””

“What is the meat dungeon…”

“Humph, to think you don’t know about this, well-”

While the others regaled Grandpa Gon with tales about the meat dungeon, I made my way back to the house. Since I can’t control their hunting urge, I might as well direct it towards a less harmful venue.

After all, monsters in dungeons don’t go extinct.

[Gumihou: Redid the ‘drag Elland away’ scene, add more funnies]

[1] Deleted second and third ‘Jorgen and Adela are very apologetic’ like, we know already…

[2] Give a more interesting explanation for ‘Ground Mushroom’

[3] Change ‘yay, they are happy’ to ‘tch, now you will miss my cooking even more’

[4] Replaced some repetitive dialogues with a description of Elland-san’s ‘escort’

[5] Reduce the loooong goodbye